An old colleague of mine sends me quotes which sometimes inspire me to have a think about what life is all about. Here are a few sent over the years .
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“Act as if what you do
makes a difference. It does” William James
who was an American philosopher and psychologist who pioneered functional
psychology, helped establish the philosophy of pragmatism, and was the first
to teach a psychology course in the U.S “It takes something more
than intelligence to act intelligently” Fyodor Dostoyevsky,
whose 1866 novel Crime and Punishment explores guilt, redemption, and
morality through the story of Raskolnikov, a destitute ex-student who murders
a pawnbroker to test his theory that some people are above the law. "What a wee little
part of a person's life are his acts and his words. His real life is
led in his head and is known to none but himself" Mark Twain, born
Samuel Clemens, was a legendary American author and humourist best known for The
Adventures of Tom Sawyer and Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, whose
sharp wit and storytelling helped shape modern American literature "We must let go of
the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for
us" Joseph
Campbell was an American writer and professor best known for his work
in comparative mythology, especially
his theory of the Hero’s Journey, a universal narrative pattern found
in myths across cultures Thanks to Keith
Gregory |
So here is one I came across myself last week “Take a moment to think of three things you’re grateful for – say them out loud, reflect on them silently, or jot them down”. Dr Michael Swift a UK-based integrative psychologist and senior psychotherapist known for his expertise in high-intensity therapy, particularly for anxiety disorders, OCD, and health psychology.
I think we are all grateful to be alive and the news is full of heartache of people taken before they reach an age of discovery to decide what they are going to do, what they are wanting to achieve or just to find the right role to play in the “game of life”. I heard the 86-year-old David Hamilton relay one of his "Boom Radio" listeners quotes this week, where they stated that their mum often said” life is like a toilet roll - the more you get to the end of it - the faster it goes to the end”. As you get older things start to prey on your mind. Should I take out a funeral plan, how long have I left to go, you cannot watch a programme on advert TV without this kind of reminder that you don’t know what’s round the corner.
Legends come and go too so it doesn’t matter how you feature in life’s choices. Here are just a few of people that I have watched, listened to or admired over my lifetime.
So how’s the body clock? As you get older sleep patterns change as I reflect a communication from one of my readers who says “I can’t sleep past 7:30 anymore. Body clock has broken”
Having been diagnosed with PC in December 2023, I look back over my time on this earth with memories of my Royal Navy career of 28 years, people I have met and worked with and the camaraderie we had in those good old days, some appear in my blogs to which this is my 70th script. I thought about giving up the writing until someone wrote me and said ,"Any Blogs Upcoming".
As a Strawberry (mivvie) aka a “civvie”, as we termed those who were not in uniform, I have spent some 21 years out of such attire.
The term "Strawberry Mivvi" originally referred to a popular British ice lolly made by Lyons Maid, featuring a creamy vanilla ice cream centre coated in strawberry-flavoured ice. It became a nostalgic treat for many growing up in the UK, especially for kids like me growing up during the 1970s.
The nickname "Strawberry Mivvie" has occasionally been playfully used to describe a civilian—especially one perceived as soft or indulgent—drawing on the lolly’s sweet, creamy nature.
To be honest, the “strawberry years” has been a time of slog and hurt. So for most non-military persons they have had to live in this "slog" from the get-go of life. If I could advise anyone about living a good life, it would come from the second half of mine; during the “slog years”. Because my first 28 years in the Royal Navy was as Tina said, “Simply the Best”.
Living a "good life" is a deeply personal journey, but there are common threads that weave through most of those elements and more so these days there are practices of well-being, calm and mindfulness which in my Navy time was called sending one to “Welfare”.
So here is my advice, drawing from my sixty-six years on the planet.
1. Cultivate Meaningful Connections:
Prioritise relationships: Invest time and energy in the people who uplift you – family, friends, and community. Strong social bonds are a cornerstone of happiness and resilience. Avoid people who are just out for themselves and will use you to advance their own careers or take credit for your ideas.
2. Nurture Your Inner World:
Don't let life pass you by. Take time to be fully present in the moment, savouring experiences, love and emotions. Don’t be afraid to say “I love you” to someone you really do care about. Seize opportunities, they lead to regrets later. Get advice from those you trust if you are making big decisions. This can reduce stress and increase appreciation. Just get to know yourself: Understand your values, strengths, passions, and what truly makes you feel alive. Living authentically and aligning your actions with your core beliefs is crucial for fulfilment. Finally, let go of what doesn't serve you: This includes past hurts, (this has been hard for me, but I have finally let things go- I think) and so avoid negative self-talk, and even relationships that drain your energy. Forgiveness (of self and others) can be incredibly liberating.
3. Find meaning in your activities:
Whether it's your work, hobbies, or volunteering, seek out activities that resonate with your skills and contribute to something larger than yourself. This creates a sense of purpose and "flow” and do keep learning and growing: Maintain curiosity. Read, explore new ideas, try new things, finish what you started and be the best YOU that you can be. Personal growth keeps life interesting and prevents stagnation. Set intentional goals: Having things to work towards, even small ones, provides direction and a sense of accomplishment.
We hear a lot about gratitude being good for the soul, and it absolutely is.
So, as Dr Swift says, just taking a moment to acknowledge what you're thankful for can lift your spirits, shift your perspective, and even make you feel more connected to the world around you. But what if I told you that saying, "thank you" (even to yourself!) isn't just a warm, fuzzy feeling, but a powerful cognitive workout for your brain?
I think that it's true. While the practice of gratitude often feels deeply personal and psychological, its ripple effects extend directly into the very functions that help you navigate your day: your executive function, memory, and decision-making.
Think about it: when you're feeling overwhelmed, stressed, or just plain down, what's the first thing to suffer? Often, it's your ability to focus, remember important details, or make clear, calm choices. Your brain's "control centre" gets bogged down in the negativity.
Here's where gratitude steps in as your secret weapon. Regularly pausing to appreciate even the smallest things – the perfectly brewed cup of coffee, a warm blanket, a kind word from a colleague, or even just the quiet hum of your refrigerator – can actively boost your mood. And a boosted mood isn't just about feeling good; it's a direct pathway to a more efficient, resilient brain.
When your mood is elevated, your brain experiences less of the "noise" that stress creates, and you can focus more easily on tasks at hand. Recall information with greater clarity and make more reasoned and thoughtful decisions, even when the pressure is on.
Your Turn - go on have a go?
Ready to give your brain a gratitude glow-up? It's incredibly simple, and you can do it anywhere, anytime.
Take a moment right now. Seriously, stop reading for just a second.
* Think of three things you're grateful for. Don't overthink it. Big or small, recent or a cherished memory – whatever comes to mind first.
* Say them out loud, whisper them, reflect on them silently in your head, or even jot them down in a notebook or on your phone.
Feel that slight shift? That little lift? That's your brain beginning its workout. Making this a regular practice – maybe first thing in the morning, before bed, or during a stressful moment – can truly transform not just how you feel, but how you think.
How are you doing playing the real "Game of Life"
POEM
“Take three things “
Football, Tottenham, is my first!
Keeping my brain tuned over seasons of thirst.
Resilience, I’m grateful to have survived PC.
I’ve learned a lot to a be a better me!
Regrets I have, as Frank said “a few”
I still miss the “crack” though of the chosen few!
Love in my life, is probably my second
Learning to love again after one hurt beckoned
Dealing with age, body clock broken
Rising earlier, listening to Boom with no word spoken
Making the most of each day of my life
Thanking my lucky stars for a wonderful wife
Children and grandkids, I guess is my third!
Some disappear, never to be heard
Some take time to even appear
How old will I be, this time next year
I hope and I pray that I will be there
More love in my life that I can share.
